Patience is a Virtue #passwords #disability #privacy

Let's face it, I am not the most patient person in the world.  On a scale of 1-10, I would probably rate at around - hmmm let me think - 2!  However, to cut the queues I follow the protocols of procedure to lesson my angst in waiting.  For instance, in bank accounts I apply, and receive, the relevant ID logins and passwords to enable quick access. Or at least shorten the length of the 'We value our client's and you will be put through to a customer service operator ASAP!" statements, and the endless advertisements, reassuring me that I am in the hands of the Number 1 bank in the land.

These passwords and codes are to guarantee that your privacy, or security, is not breached in anyway. These automated voice banks promise you instant access to your accounts.  They clear the pathways for the operator with whom you finally speak. The operator no longer has to waste even more time mulling over whether you know your Great Aunties maiden name, who had 3 fathers, or the dog, that when they ask its name, you say an affectionate name, not the real thing, and bang, you're passing your toenail clippings down the line for DNA testing, to establish something you thought you had already established, when you logged in with those names and numbers.  

becomeabankteller.com

About 2 weeks ago, I decided as I passed my bank, that I would just go in and ask for a re-issue of a card in both our names as it expires while we are overseas.  To my surprise, the exercise was rather painless! She assured us that the reissued cards would arrive in the mail within 7 working days. 'Great,' we thought, 'I might physically go into the bank more often, as this seemed simpler and more efficient than I had imagined.'  Again, to my surprise in the mail came the new cards in 3 days. On looking at the shiny, new, virginal cards, I glanced at their beauty to see that the expiry date was the same. Thinking of human error, I decided to venture back to my bank rather than that phone call.  Again, quite painless, with the apology for her boss ticking the wrong box! All would be fixed and re-issue would be done again within 7 days.  Yes, in another 4 days, owing to weekend in between, the cards arrived again.  You guessed it - same expiry dates!!!!

On top of this, we decided that same day to do a bank transfer from our app to find, somehow, the limit (of our own money I might add) had been dropped remarkably.  I then ring the internet banking team with the usual protocols in place, ask to speak to a consultant. Then with the round of questions regarding my time of conception, my blood type, and sperm count, I was finally spoken to regarding reissue and the limit allowance.  She, then on looking into my profile, assured me that she would not be able to discuss unless my partner spoke on the phone to verify his existence and, maybe divulge his deceased father's brand of his first bicycle (remember he is Asian.)   I explained that my partner is deaf which would create a problem when speaking on the phone. I reminded her of the 3rd party disclosure we had agreed upon when opening the account in the first place.  After 1 hour and numerous discussions with her supervisors she accepted and assured me our limit had again been raised, along with following her step by step on my iMac to reinstate the original limit.

That night we decided to transfer some funds, only to be rejected again.  Oh bother I thought!!!!!  I rang the bank! After setting in the pass protocols was told that the consultants only work till 7 pm, thank you for your patience, and ring again in the morning after 9 am Eastern Standard Time.  To ease my lack of serenity I did partake in a few medicinal wines for comfort.  Next morning, I rang the bank, and again, was objected to the same scrutiny of privacy as the day before.  With already telling the consultant that this conversation might not be pretty, she accepted, and then advised that the quickest and most efficient way to deal with this was was to transfer my call to the bank who had done the reissue, so they may reissue again, as they would have our true signatures on file.  Two hours later, after being on hold, and listing my credibility and last ten transactions in order for security, I was spoken to by the original manager at the branch who assures me the re-re-reissue would transpire forthwith and the limit would be raised again post haste. Oh, and I forgot, 'Thank you for banking with the Number 1 bank in the land!' script.  

Ok my patience was tested.  I think I actually deserve some bonus queue jumps for it.  The point of the matter is, yes, I believe in national security and that some scammer does not access my account and spend my funds on Taliban subscriptions. But, and its a tough call when you have accounts in both names and singularly you can't access information unless both verify. (Though one had thought that that little password and passcode was the key to our account)  One can only imagine the plight my partner would have been in if I was not around or, he was making the inquiry as the deaf guy he is.  

archive.indianexpress.com

The question I am asking is, can these institutions think past the number crunching, and realize that some people cannot access in the way they propose for full visioned, full hearing, people?  Yes, it is fine to say that there are relay services for those with disabilities. But, can they also realize that we are all human and maybe need some easier methods to communicate.  With us for example, you have one hearing and one non hearing person trying to communicate. Neither can use the same service successfully especially if they are in joint names, without SMS's flying in with approval to speak or SMS's flying in to transfer. These SMS's, I might add, are on the very phone that is attached to the hearing persons ear speaking to the consultant at the time trying to verify himself.  You think I'm confused?? Put yourselves in the disabled person's shoes as they go through the conundrum on a daily basis.  Would it not be kinder to bring back some more personal assistance.  
 
These are my thoughts until next time stay safe, be kind to yourself, and to others, and keep in touch. Until then, I will go to try and transfer some funds, and make new friends, at the land's Number 1 Bank.

Cheers!

Bitchescoz
 
Contact: luke65mcbride@gmail.com

disabilities.uchicago.edu

Hearing with your Heart

I have lived with full hearing my whole life, and for most part, I have shared my life with hearing people, partners and friends.  My question is do we, as hearing people actually hear or, do we only hear what we want to?  I have heard the expression 'Oh he/she has selective hearing!'  But, is this just a way of blocking out what we don't want to hear;  an I'll deal with that in my own time; an explanation why we don't say what we are thinking; or just plain ignorance?
 
A few times I have had the bad experience of texting a message to a fully hearing, fully seeing person (usually a family member) and they take offense as to what is written. Though they have all their senses in tact, they find it too difficult to clarify the message, instead, going off the deep end and not discovering the true meaning of the text. Then they, after you have had to put everything apart from your toenail clippings in a bag to explain the context of the message, say - 'Why didn't you say that in the first place?'  Or worse - 'You know I hate texting, people shortcut these things and you don't get the meaning.'  My question to that is - Why did you, as the receiver of the text, not ask for an explanation? Why did you let it get out of hand?  Why did you text ten people afterwards telling them I was a scum bag for what I text?  The very thing I text was innocent, the meaning non-intentional and was merely a grammatical mistake! But, that one flippant remark was broadcast to (not the original text I might add) friends, family and anyone who happened to be calling that day, with the inclusion of some very emotional extrapolations to boot.  And, this misunderstanding devoured a whole night, trying to explain as to why you said, or in this case, didn't say those damning comments.  Therefore, I believe those same hearing, seeing people also suffer from a complaint that I call 'selective textness' - a lack of taking time to re-read the text, putting what is said into perspective or, as a political 'has been' once said bothering to ask 'Please explain!'  Instead they create a storm in a teacup that escalates the situation so far out of hand that the only way to solve it is to book a one way ticket to a country without telecommunications or, call in the national guard and welfare agencies to fix the demons that escape unknowingly from my cell phone. Basically, none of this would be needed if they take the time to actually communicate directly with me as to what I might, or might not, have said!

Having wafted on about this, my main reason is to explain how I think communication is often taken  lightly. In this time of fast food, fast cars and internet dating, people don't take the time to listen to, or worse to actually understand, what the other person is trying to say.

My life partner is profoundly deaf and, only in the last few months has been equipped with a cochlear implant.  Might I just add his first language is not English which has complications in itself. Developing communication with each other does take time and effort on both our parts. The doctors say that in time the brain will accept and identify of the new found sounds that he hears, and owing to his ethnicity he hears English as a bit of a gabble.  You see he lost his hearing at the age of 9 and, until now he has lip read those of his native tongue, making it a tad difficult to understand what we, the English, are saying. Might I say it is also exciting to introduce him to sounds he has never heard before - to explain its a bird, a door bell or rain on the roof.  It has the magic of teaching a child new experiences and the sharing of these first experiences together. Yes, there are misunderstandings but, for the most part, we do take time to try to let the other person understand our point of view.  This is why I beg you to try to communicate more, try to give someone your time, try to feel it from their side instead of just believing its all about you. It is in fact, much smoother sailing if you join and care about someone instead of just yourself.  You are not the unlucky one here, you are given the gifts of full communication and should help others who may not of heard that beautiful sound of a bird singing or the wonderful sound of rain falling on a tin roof.

We, as a couple, have found that one of the greatest assets we have is a whiteboard and the use of our phones to text an explanation of something that somehow defies us. Yes, it takes a little more time but, it is worth spending the time and letting each other know what it is we are feeling or want to convey. By returning the writings or the text, we keep the communication open, rather than closing down and taking the misinterpretation to a higher level, let alone bringing unsuspecting others into what should, or could, have been so simple without the need of the national guard.

Therefore, I ask you to open up and talk more! If you can't verbalise it, then write it down and get others to understand what you really wanted. Writing can also be quite cathartic as well, and bring peace to others minds as well as your own.

Take care, open your hearts as well as your ears and eyes and the world will be a better place!

Bitchescoz!