Jenny Craig and the Bulimic Diet Plan

Strangely enough, for my whole life most people have chosen to never tell me the truth and  inevitably the truth always comes out at some stage. No matter how simple the question, they simply cannot give me a straight answer. Funny really, a gay guy wanting a straight answer.  Though in my heart I know that the lie is there, and the more I search for the truth, the deeper they build or extend the lie. And sure enough when the truth is out I work myself up to such a state that  I’m projectile puking like a Jenny Craig bulimia diet plan. Sadly, I am not skinny and I do apologize to those that suffer from the disease. 

I am seriously wondering why people can’t be open?  Yes, the truth may hurt sometimes but, at least it is the truth, and there is no white washing it.  In my heart of hearts I know that the deception is there and the more I delve the deeper the wound, the more fabricated the lie becomes.  For instance a couple of years ago we were organizing our trip to Europe and I was discussing my thoughts of the plans to my friend to discuss with her husband.  I would ask her to run my thoughts past her husband. She was convincing in the beginning that she would discuss when he got home from work.  Days would go by and I would repeat my questions and either she would avoid (pretend she never read my messages) or tell me he had to race out early for work, or would return from work tired and go straight to bed or golf days were on etc etc.  The little fibs kept building and my curiosity and wanting an answer was wearing thin. It came to the Friday and she avoided the topic by saying she would speak with him on the weekend. Sure, I thought (NOT)!  She is avoiding, fibbing, hiding something, or was too embarrassed to tell me she was a tight ass (which I already had known so no need hide). That very last night after finishing my talks with her and her telling me she would ask him on the weekend, I was running down my newsfeed on FB to see her husband say “Enjoying Turkey”  and photos to match.  The next day I thought, ‘I won’t let on.’ So, when I spoke to her asking how she was going explaining my thoughts to her husband, she said she would ask as soon as he got home from his golf.  I let her run with her deception until a day or two later I ask if his game was in Turkey?   Turkey she proclaimed, with a dash of guilt.  Yes, I said I saw him on FB.  The excuses came left right and centre as to why she had not told me.  None of which would have taken precedence over truth, but hey she promised never to lie again, we went on our holiday of Europe and the Turkey saga is behind us. 

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Having given an example of a simple lie, I wonder why do people have to do it?  Why can’t they be open?  They can be forthright in business dealings.  Forthright in their political and religious beliefs but when asked some simple question from a friend or relative does it need the deceit?  Please, don’t tell me they didn’t want to hurt my feelings!  That’s what it does big time with the barrage of cover-ups and avoidance of topic because the truth comes out in the smallest of ways, and cuts like a surgeon’s scalpel.  

 

Is it that some people are more prone to being lied to than others?  Do they expect me to be like a policeman and search for the truth?  Or do they really think I am a fool who is gullible enough to let it go without question?  Why is it that those who have been hurt badly must be subjected to more deceit from their closest and dearest? 

Simply I put I to my jury of readers - why is it so? 

Until next time cheers, care for yourselves and those around you. 

Being Alive! #love #caring #insecurities #alive

With iPad and mug of hot chocolate, I followed the sun for the morning warmth in my courtyard among my flowers and visiting birds.  I was ready to write my thank-you notes to those who emailed me on my last article, 'You've got a Friend'. Suddenly into my solitude, burst the sounds of a young re-incarnated Elaine Stritch or very alive Bernadette Peters belting out 'Let it go' from the musical "Frozen".  This young 4 year old neighbour has the voice of an angel and the lungs of all the divas combined.  

I sat and  drank my chocolate and just listened to the lyrics of wisdom proffered by this little diva. By now, most of you will have realized that music really floats my boat.  It makes me feel alive, and the lyrics and uplifting of this song with its heart felt words made me think of Sondheim's 'Being Alive'. And there in my head was an ensemble of Patti Lu Pone, Barbra Streisand, Bernadette Peters, and Sondheim himself on keyboard. What a performance was going on in my head!  Not to mention, I too, was up there on stage offering my dulcet tones to the mix.  

Coming off stage with the greats, my thoughts of thank-you notes passed and, I just wanted to share that if we all took those words into our everyday lives, as I feel the master writer himself intended, we could make a real difference.  If we opened our hearts and and minds to those around us, gave a little of ourselves, all of our lives would be indeed blessed.  

It just means giving a little to those around us - reaching out and making a difference.  Every gentle touch builds to a worldwide hug. A hug that this world really needs right now. Not one person really needs to go it alone. All it takes is a nod of assurance, a gentle smile, a warm hello.  Each and everyone of us, has the capability to do at least one of these things.  God knows, with each and everyone of us turning to our neighbour, and giving a warm hello and an encouraging glance, it may stop the cycle of war and injustice.  

Let's all try to be a cycle breaker, lets show our friends, our families and our new found friends that we are as insecure as they are. That we too need someone to be close to. Someone to share with, someone to give, someone to mock us with praise and someone to love.   

Let's break this self fulfilling prophecy of doom and gloom and fill it with hope.  Let's fill it with a song of joy, a song of freedom, a song of equality.  Let's join my little neighbour in her song of 'Let it Go' and let go of the prejudices, the anger and loneliness.

Join me on stage with my ensemble! Declare that we want to be crowded with love, love that comes through caring! Know that there is someone to help us shed our insecurities and not to be frightened any more. Help us survive and give us hope that we are truly  'Being Alive'.

These are my thoughts.

Cheers!

Bitchescoz

Contact: luke65mcbride@gmail.com 

Being Alive - Bernadette Peters