Let's face it, I am not the most patient person in the world. On a scale of 1-10, I would probably rate at around - hmmm let me think - 2! However, to cut the queues I follow the protocols of procedure to lesson my angst in waiting. For instance, in bank accounts I apply, and receive, the relevant ID logins and passwords to enable quick access. Or at least shorten the length of the 'We value our client's and you will be put through to a customer service operator ASAP!" statements, and the endless advertisements, reassuring me that I am in the hands of the Number 1 bank in the land.
These passwords and codes are to guarantee that your privacy, or security, is not breached in anyway. These automated voice banks promise you instant access to your accounts. They clear the pathways for the operator with whom you finally speak. The operator no longer has to waste even more time mulling over whether you know your Great Aunties maiden name, who had 3 fathers, or the dog, that when they ask its name, you say an affectionate name, not the real thing, and bang, you're passing your toenail clippings down the line for DNA testing, to establish something you thought you had already established, when you logged in with those names and numbers.
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| becomeabankteller.com |
About 2 weeks ago, I decided as I passed my bank, that I would just go in and ask for a re-issue of a card in both our names as it expires while we are overseas. To my surprise, the exercise was rather painless! She assured us that the reissued cards would arrive in the mail within 7 working days. 'Great,' we thought, 'I might physically go into the bank more often, as this seemed simpler and more efficient than I had imagined.' Again, to my surprise in the mail came the new cards in 3 days. On looking at the shiny, new, virginal cards, I glanced at their beauty to see that the expiry date was the same. Thinking of human error, I decided to venture back to my bank rather than that phone call. Again, quite painless, with the apology for her boss ticking the wrong box! All would be fixed and re-issue would be done again within 7 days. Yes, in another 4 days, owing to weekend in between, the cards arrived again. You guessed it - same expiry dates!!!!
On top of this, we decided that same day to do a bank transfer from our app to find, somehow, the limit (of our own money I might add) had been dropped remarkably. I then ring the internet banking team with the usual protocols in place, ask to speak to a consultant. Then with the round of questions regarding my time of conception, my blood type, and sperm count, I was finally spoken to regarding reissue and the limit allowance. She, then on looking into my profile, assured me that she would not be able to discuss unless my partner spoke on the phone to verify his existence and, maybe divulge his deceased father's brand of his first bicycle (remember he is Asian.) I explained that my partner is deaf which would create a problem when speaking on the phone. I reminded her of the 3rd party disclosure we had agreed upon when opening the account in the first place. After 1 hour and numerous discussions with her supervisors she accepted and assured me our limit had again been raised, along with following her step by step on my iMac to reinstate the original limit.
That night we decided to transfer some funds, only to be rejected again. Oh bother I thought!!!!! I rang the bank! After setting in the pass protocols was told that the consultants only work till 7 pm, thank you for your patience, and ring again in the morning after 9 am Eastern Standard Time. To ease my lack of serenity I did partake in a few medicinal wines for comfort. Next morning, I rang the bank, and again, was objected to the same scrutiny of privacy as the day before. With already telling the consultant that this conversation might not be pretty, she accepted, and then advised that the quickest and most efficient way to deal with this was was to transfer my call to the bank who had done the reissue, so they may reissue again, as they would have our true signatures on file. Two hours later, after being on hold, and listing my credibility and last ten transactions in order for security, I was spoken to by the original manager at the branch who assures me the re-re-reissue would transpire forthwith and the limit would be raised again post haste. Oh, and I forgot, 'Thank you for banking with the Number 1 bank in the land!' script.
Ok my patience was tested. I think I actually deserve some bonus queue jumps for it. The point of the matter is, yes, I believe in national security and that some scammer does not access my account and spend my funds on Taliban subscriptions. But, and its a tough call when you have accounts in both names and singularly you can't access information unless both verify. (Though one had thought that that little password and passcode was the key to our account) One can only imagine the plight my partner would have been in if I was not around or, he was making the inquiry as the deaf guy he is.
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| archive.indianexpress.com |
The question I am asking is, can these institutions think past the number crunching, and realize that some people cannot access in the way they propose for full visioned, full hearing, people? Yes, it is fine to say that there are relay services for those with disabilities. But, can they also realize that we are all human and maybe need some easier methods to communicate. With us for example, you have one hearing and one non hearing person trying to communicate. Neither can use the same service successfully especially if they are in joint names, without SMS's flying in with approval to speak or SMS's flying in to transfer. These SMS's, I might add, are on the very phone that is attached to the hearing persons ear speaking to the consultant at the time trying to verify himself. You think I'm confused?? Put yourselves in the disabled person's shoes as they go through the conundrum on a daily basis. Would it not be kinder to bring back some more personal assistance.
These are my thoughts until next time stay safe, be kind to yourself, and to others, and keep in touch. Until then, I will go to try and transfer some funds, and make new friends, at the land's Number 1 Bank.
Cheers!
Bitchescoz
Contact: luke65mcbride@gmail.com
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| disabilities.uchicago.edu |
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